SHTF: The coming food riots

So you have heard all about the looming, powder keg in the making, soon to be shown in an urban area near you, Food Riots?

Sure you have. Read any of the survival message boards or what not and you KNOW they are just around the corner, right? Soon, there will be little if any foods available in our grocery stores because of floods, global warming, global food demand, a shrinking food supply and the ever weakening fiat currency, the U.S. dollar, right?

Wrong.

In my opinion, I don't think widespread rioting in the United States is likely. In fact, I think there will be very little in today's man made, limited crises world. Let me explain.

First, food shortages will affect restaurants long before the grocery store. No, not that little boutique restaurant downtown. We are talking about the big box, mega chain fast food complex. When your average American cannot get a Big Pounder and bucket of fries to go along with that 55-gallon diet caca because the McRonaldary is out of food, they will know something is afoot.

Will they riot then?

No, they will then tramp across the street to Booger Royalty and see if the same situation applies there, and then on to Taco Heck and Was-Once-Beef before realizing "Hey, there ain't no food here!".

Now will they riot?

No they will call the local news station, ACLU, and BBB and demand a mini-cam come out and record their grievance. After all, food is a right, right?

But no riots not when there is a complaint department and an eager and compliant mass media.

Okay what about when there's no food at the local Kroger or Piggly Wiggly?

When food shortages finally reach the grocery stores, the real miff is going to be due to the shortage of ready-to-eat-and-die convenience foods, beer, candy, and cigarettes. The average American has no idea where food comes from and most have no idea what it looks like until it's wrapped in bright colored paper and has a serving suggestion airbrushed on the cover.

Never will they walk out of the frozen food section and see if there is any fresh meat, vegetables or fruits available and if there were, most would not know what to do with the ingredients much less be able to read a cookbook above the third grade level. So nope, no riots then either.

OK, what about when the REAL groceries start to disappear? Will there please be riots then?

When meat, vegetables, fruits, potatoes, pasta and what not starts showing up missing, there won't be riots then either. Rather, a bunch of entitlement freaks will stand in front of the store and want passers by to sign a petition, then they will protest and plan a boycott of the Big Evil Corporation which owns the grocery store. Someone will provocatively blog about it and another will build a web page to raise awareness. Then they will blame the president and want someone to bring them fast food, debit cards and a habitat for polar bears.

Nope no riots then either. However, there will be plenty of soundbites from "angry consumers" and "community activists". Yet, there will be very few riots.

The majority of American people no longer have riots in their veins.

The average American is deathly afraid of direct confrontation. Sure, they will vote for anyone who will promise to "get" the greedy corporations and and raise taxes on "that greedy rich guy". But this same angry consumer is a heck of a lot less likely to march over to the wealthy guy's house and demand that rich guy hand him a couple of hundred dollars and a bag of groceries because he feels he is somehow owed it. Better to use a faceless nameless proxy to get that which he is afraid to work for.

Nope, there will be no food riots. Rioting over basic necessities is no longer part of our plush, fat lifestyle. Rather, we are willing to riot over important events like aircraft seat assignments, concert tickets and exclusive pre-school enrollment.

And when the crowds finally wake up, and do become agitated because there is no fuel for the car or body, you should hardly care.

When the food shortages start, you should have already had a supply of food at home by carefully shopping and stocking up now.
You should also have had a back up plan for additional food from a garden in the backyard.
Further, you should be well aware how to get your mitts on more food from unorthodox supply locations.
Never should you be ready to hit the loot lines and hope to obtain a few choice canned goods and left over bags of pinto beans amidst the destruction. Those that join in the final fray of looting will find themselves injured, dead or herded off to a interment camp.

Nope, there will be no riots. Because by the time the average American wakes up and finds out there are no Ding Dong Donots or McStuffins available, it will be too late. So stop waiting for the food riots on TV. Instead, pop in a copy of Red Dawn on the old DVD player (or similar fine fair) and enjoy yourself this evening.